Codependency
why do I fix everyone
Codependency is organising your own wellbeing around managing someone else's. It often looks like devotion and functions like control, because your stability depends on regulating their behaviour or their mood.
What to do about it
Ask what you would do this week if their reaction were not a factor. Then do one of those things.
Books that work on this
Each is a 90-day programme. Start with the first — later books assume the work in the earlier ones.
The Adult Relationship$6.99
The Connection Blueprint$6.99
Marriage Is Job$6.99
Stop Lying Conflict$6.99
Friendship At Forty$6.99
The Loneliness Problem$6.99
Guard The Gate$6.99
Direct Is Kinder$6.99Part of the Connection series.
How people say it
Nobody looks this up by its clinical name. These are the ways it actually gets said.
- I lose myself in relationships
- their mood runs my day
- I cannot be happy if they are upset
- why do I fix everyone
- I do not know what I want anymore
- enmeshed with my partner
- I feel responsible for their feelings
Written by Brian Spiker, who has run Spiker Carpet and Tile Care since 2013 — the receipts. More terms in the encyclopedia.