Hi. I'm Brian.
I clean carpets for a living.
Years cleaning carpets
0
Spiker Carpet and Tile Care · 2013-now
Books shipped
0
Live count
Books planned
0
12 series × 53 books
The short version
One van. One wand. Didn't know how to run a business.
2013— Started Spiker Carpet and Tile Care. One van. One wand. Knew how to clean carpets. Didn't know how to run a business. Learned that part the hard way.
The work— Carpet cleaning. Carpet protection. Upholstery cleaning and protection. Tile and grout — we clean it and seal it so it stops looking dirty 10 minutes after you mop. Pet smells — the wet-dog smell that gets baked into your carpet from microbiological oils, and urine which needs actual enzymes to break down or it just keeps coming back. Most guys won't bother with the enzyme treatment. I do, because otherwise we're just making the carpet look clean and the customer still smells dog piss for the next six months.
2016–2024— Just kept working. Real customers. Real reviews. Real bad days. Days the truck broke down. Days the customer was crazy. Saturdays the weather wiped out. Years where I came home broke and exhausted and thought about quitting and didn't.
2024-ish — Started writing. I was driving between jobs listening to self-help podcasts and getting mad at the radio. Half these guys have never had a real job. They were telling people stuff that sounded great in a studio but was wrong on a job site. So I started writing what I actually thought.
Now there's 636 books planned. 12 series. First 12 are out.
What's different about my books
- 01I curse a lot. If you don’t curse, you’ll think I’m an asshole. That’s fine, just don’t say I didn’t warn you.
- 02I make fun of you. The way a friend would. I’m not mean about it — but I’m not going to pretend you’re not the one who downloaded five productivity apps last month.
- 03I make fun of myself more.
- 04Every chapter has a story from an actual carpet job. Not as a metaphor. Just because that’s what I have.
- 05There’s no "manifest your dreams" stuff. None. If that’s what you want, the door’s right there.
- 06There’s no morning routine chapter. Your morning routine isn’t the problem. You’re the problem and you know it.
- 07I’m not going to tell you to journal.
What's the same as other self-help books
- 01There’s a lot of them.
- 02They cost money. $6.99 for the ebook. Cocktail price.
- 03They’re trying to help you. I’m just trying to help the way a friend would. Which means telling you stuff you don’t want to hear.
If you read this far, you'll probably like the books.
If you hated this page, you'll hate them more.
Either way. Thanks for stopping by.
— Brian
Stuff you can check yourself
Receipts.
- Spiker Carpet and Tile Care — since 2013 — spikercarpetandtilecare.com
- Apex Flow Labs — the parent company — apexflowlabs.com
- Apex Publishing House— the books (you're here)
- Apex Publishing House podcast — free, every weekday
If any of it's fake, email me. I pay the hosting bill. I'd want to know.